A QUESTION OF SIZE-Reposted by Permission.

You may be saying to your self "self, I thought we COVERED this already. . . .Joe, what is this all about? And Joe would say "Too, true, too true, but one of Joe's favourite (okay, not really favourite. . .okay, really sort of favourite, but not charmingest favourite) persons posted this post elsewhere, and sent it to Joe, and Joe dug it, so Joe asked to re-post, and here you are, and here is WHY.

The Question of materials, in general, comes up from time to time. Like, you know, ALL the time. "Hey, Joe," say the beagles, "hey, how long should my rezzy really BE, Joe? What should I put in there Joe? Which is better, Corned Beef or Pastrami?"

You know, really, well, FOUNDATIONAL questions. Joe often ponders these things (except the one about Corned Beef and Pastrami. . .that one. . .that one is a toughie. . .it will require many MANY more sandwiches to answer). And when someone ELSE has an insight, Joe is all over it, like an Associate on a Stripper offering half-price lap dances, (and so, for the record, is Joe).

Here then, a niblet about Resume length. Yeah, yeah, guys and length, guys and size. . .Joe likes that, the way it sounds. . .guys and size. Some of you, you need to answer one of those ads in the back of Men's Journal, or Men's Fitness, or GQ, or Esquire, or Something. . .I swear. Or date shorter women. . .or SOMEthing, jeez!

A QUESTION OF SIZE

Like most matters, and, frankly, QUESTIONS of size, I think this one has a LOT to do with how one was, or was not, blessed by nature.

Most people answer from their own perspective, and, sadly, most of our perspectives are informed, not by logic, not by pragmatism, but my myth, fantasy, history, fear, misinformation, and, sometimes, our magical lucky charms. . .who the hell knows?

The answer, as in so many other things in life is. . .your resume should be PRECISELY as long as it NEEDS to be to tell me everything I need to know about YOU, in order to know whether or not YOU are the man or woman of my dreams, job-wise. PERIOD. That's it, that's all.

I agree that the most important information should be first, but as to whether it should be the first third of the first page, or the first three lines of the top half above optical center in 10 pt. Optima, or whatever, I don't know, and I have better things to do than spend much time navel-gazing over those details.

Here's the answer: If you want to capture my attention, then CAPTURE MY ATTENTION. If you want me to listen to your story, then TELL ME A STORY THAT WILL GRAB ME. You KNOW how to do it. . .you learned when you were less than two years old. . .EVERYBODY DOES!

Why we have to have such a shrying gevalt over this hoo-hah, ALL THE TIME, frankly, is beyond me.

And, as a recruiter myself, I can tell you what I AM looking for. . .I'm looking for diamonds. But I don't have time to mine them, rough them, cut them, polish them, grade them, mount them, and THEN select them. . .really I don't. I want to be able to throw the lot of them on a big ole table (covered in black velvet, naturally. . .hey, this is MY fantasy). . .walk around, and find the one that sparkles the brightest, and say "THAT one. . .THAT's the one I want!"

So, if YOU want to capture MY attention (and I have a shorter attention span than the average two-year old. . .frankly, when compared with the average two-year-old, I don't come out so good in MANY respects), then you really need to sparkle, and you'd better do it quick.

Because, as captivating as a diamond IS, and they always ARE. . .let's face it, given the choice between a diamond and, say, Silly Putty(tm), the average two-year old will ditch the sparkly in less than no time, and so will I.

EDITORIAL NOTE: For the first time, possibly ever, Joe has nothing to add.

LOVE YOUR RECRUITER!!



JoeRecruiter